Information on Abuse, Safety Strategies and How You Can Help

The most dangerous time for a woman is when she has made the decision to leave her abusive relationship.
​If you witness or are certain there is a direct threat to a woman and/or her child(ren)
call 9-1-1 or Child Abuse Hotline 
1-800-387-5437 (KIDS).

A woman may stay for many reasons, including: 
Fear (of being alone, of his threats, of being judged, etc.) 
Self-blame 
Anger
Depression
Lowered self-esteem
Want the relationship to succeed 
For love
Self-doubt
Belief/hope that he’ll change
No real protection
Lack of access to protective orders
Lack of shelter
No transportation (to escape)
Lack of child care
Fear for pets
Lack of health care 
No affordable housing
Lack of language accessible services

Safety Strategies if you or someone you know is experiencing abuse: 

• Speak to an emergency shelter near you to see if there is availability - Find a Shelter
• Pack an emergency 'to go' bag, if your partner comes home and you are feeling threatened and want to leave you can grab the kids, and this bag - which will contain clothing, important documents (such as birth certificates, child tax documents, tax assessment, etc.), diapers, formula, toys, etc. so you can quickly leave the situation.
• If you do not have a phone, plan a route in which you can leave the home, and arrive to a safe place (such as a neighbour's) so you can safely call the RCMP.
• Create an emergency code with a trusted friend, family member, or local shelter (such as I would like to order pizza, or I am going to be late for coffee) so if you need someone else to contact 9-1-1 for you, they can.

• Plan with your children and identify a safe place for them. Reassure them that their job is to stay safe, not to protect you.
• Set money aside. Ask friends or family members to hold money for you, or open your own banking account that your partner is not aware of.
• Be careful when reaching out for help via Internet or telephone. Erase your Internet browsing history, websites visited for resources, e-mails sent to friends/family asking for help. To learn how to erase browsing information click here. If you called for help, dial another number immediately after in case partner hits redial.
• Create a false trail. Call motels, real estate agencies and schools in a town at least six hours away from where you plan to relocate. If your partner asks where you are going give him a believable but false answer such as a friend's home in a larger city a few hours away or to your parents home (even if it is in a different province).

SAFE EXIT

Types of Abuse: Physical, Psychological, Emotional, Sexual, Financial, Identity, Cultural, Spiritual, Stalking

​Some signs that may indicate someone is
experiencing abuse:
Unusually sad, lonely, fearful, exhausted
Difficulty concentrating
Fearful of leaving work
Upsetting or frequent phone calls
Uses alcohol or drugs to cope
Isolating oneself/withdrawn/avoiding social interaction
Regularly late for work
Anxiety
Physical abuse; unexplained bruising
Sexual assault/rape
​
The most important things we can do to help is listen, show concern and be there. You may want to react or give specific advice but try to resist, it must be the woman's decision to leave. Being a link to community resources is important. 
Click HERE for more information on abuse and safety planning.